Our New Year's Wish List

As the new year wanders in like a drowsy, flatulent capybara, Byte and Switch's editors, drinks firmly in hand, present the Top Ten things that we'd love to see happen in 2003. Cheers!

No. 10: Dell Dudes Buy EMC

Dell Computer Corp. (Nasdaq: DELL) figures that it might as well buy the cow so it can get the milk for free. Major ramifications: Dell renames the EMC Corp. (NYSE: EMC) product families "PowerClariion" and "PowerSymm"; EMC's sales teams must work for incentives like free PCs instead of commissions; Mark Lewis returns to HP.

No. 9: IT Spending Soars

Yeah, right. And David Hasselhoff will fly out of my butt.No. 8: Microsoft Puts Dozens of Storage Software Companies Out of Business

Actually, this one's not funny.

No. 7: EMC Spins Off Open Software Unit

Promising to "unlock shareholder value," EMC CEO Joe Tucci announces the company's software business will become an independent entity. But before AutoIS Inc. can launch its multibillion-dollar IPO, Microsoft Corp. (Nasdaq: MSFT) acquires it.

No. 6: QLogic Clones H.K. DesaiQLogic Corp. (Nasdaq: QLGC) announces it has created a new super race of storage CEOs. Added benefits: snappy patter and racy good looks.

No. 5: VCs Pull Heads Out of Asses

Storage bubble bursts forever when venture capitalists realize that only original ideas are worth funding. All other startups drift into oblivion.

No. 4: Brocade and McData Merge to Fight Cisco

McData Corp. (Nasdaq: MCDTA) and Brocade Communications Systems Inc. (Nasdaq: BRCD) bury the hatchet and team up to fight their common enemy. In the resulting shakeout, Greg Reyes leaves to become a self-help guru.No. 3: Hitachi Buys NetApp

The Japanese takeover of the U.S. storage market begins. Following the storming success of its reseller deal with NetApp, HDS convinces its parent to buy the company. Sayonara, EMC!

No. 2: Storage Startups Get Naked

Desperate for money, storage networking startups are forced to strip for cash. When that doesn't work, they explain to the market that they are better because they're policy-based strippers.

No. 1: Cisco Enters the Disk BusinessAfter snacking on the $400 million Fibre Channel switch market, Cisco Systems Inc. (Nasdaq: CSCO) makes its long-anticipated move into the storage systems business -- by acquiring XIOtech Corp. -- and begins the process of transforming the industry into a $10 billion commodity market.

Happy New Year, y'all!

The Editors, Byte and Switch
http://www.byteandswitch.com